5 Things You Must Do To Manage Nervousness

We all face them: a new situation, event or experience – one that you’ve never done before and want to do well in. You begin and realize that the butterflies in your stomach are exiting through the sweat on your forehead and the shaking of your hands. Not exactly the confident, secure expression you’re hoping for, but it’s happening just the same. Your nervousness is showing. The question is, where do you go from here?

To help manage the nervousness and succeed in your endeavor, there are 5 things you must do.

1. Recognize It Is Normal.

Being nervous is normal. Everyone goes through it. New,unfamiliar and stressful situations can cause our bodies to produce adrenaline,a chemical designed to give us the energy we need to either fight or flee. This affects our bodies in various ways, i.e. sweating, shaking, etc. Knowing that it is happening and utilizing it properly is the key to not allowing it to derail us.

I was doing a coaching session – one of my first and with a client that could possibly open a door to many others – and really wanted to do a good job to let the person know both the value of the process and my value as a coach. I was a bit nervous but didn’t know how much until I began to draw a wheel as part of the session. My hands were shaking, and not just a little. It was obvious to him and to me. Pressing through, and calming down as we progressed, the session ended successfully and was very much appreciated,though I have to admit I felt a bit embarrassed. Afterward I even mentioned the nervousness and he was able to relate fully because of an event he had gone through the day before. The shared recognition of how normal being nervous is brought us closer together.

2. Just Keep Going.

Many times when we realize we are nervous a tendency can be to simply want to quit. Because of wrong thinking about being nervous, we assume that if people realize we get nervous they must think we are not good enough to do the job and so we might as well stop. Nothing could be further from the truth. Many times the key to both calming down and being successful comes when we just keep going. And people recognize that if you can work through nerves you have strength and resolve to get the job done.

A day or so after the aforementioned coaching session I began to identify what I could have done both to put myself at ease as well as to communicate more effectively with the client. As stated earlier, realizing it was normal would have been helpful. Maybe saying something about it at the time to diffuse the awkwardness would have made a difference. Most importantly though, I realized that I didn’t let my nervousness stop me from doing what I came to do – help him. I worked through it. I kept going. And that was a key that helped me and can help us all.

3. Realize That The First Few Times Are The Most Difficult.

We are all passionate about something. We know what that passion is and most of us equate it to a calling we sense from God. Many of us have received education and training related to that call. We become equipped.We are ready to help. What produces nervousness are the first few times that we have an opportunity to actually apply what we’ve learned. But the more we do it and are successful, as our training, equipping and calling kick in, the success produces confidence and assurance.

For me, preaching and teaching are something I love to do and get much more excited about than I do nervous. However, when I first started I would shake throughout much of my message or class. My nervousness subsided as my experience grew. This principle is one to remember and repeat again and again, for it brings both calm and confidence as we approach the next “new” thing we are called to do.

4. Remember You Have Something Important To Give.

Remembering that we have something to give that is going to be of benefit to others is another element of bringing peace to a nerve-wracking situation. Our calling, training and experience has taken place for the sake of helping others. It’s not all about us and what it’s going to do for “me”. Remembering that we are here to serve and strengthen others helps us relax and focus on them, not on how we’re doing and what they may be thinking of us, which is many times a source of our nervousness.

5. Remember Who You Are.

The last, and in many ways the most important key to managing nervousness, is remembering who we are. It is critical to our own sense of peace, and that in turn flows out to all with whom we relate.

We are loved. We are important. Our existence is a worthwhile one. And at its core, that worth is not dependent on what we do, but simply on the fact that we are alive. It is called inherent worth, and as we grasp what it means it changes us for the better. Our worth is such that the Creator of the universe was willing to become a human being and die on our behalf. He loves us so much and so longs for relationship that He was willing to suffer the greatest humiliation any has ever endured. This realization settles forever the question of our importance. Once we understand this, we can relax because we now have nothing to prove regarding our worth. It is finished.

In summary, nervousness is okay. It doesn’t mean you’re weak or ineffective. It simply means you are nervous.

Applying these 5 principles and learning to manage nervousness can stop it from being something to fear and turn it into something to be understood, embraced and utilized for the benefit of others, and ourselves.